No... MEANS NO!

I don't know about anybody else, but this campaign, put forth by the Canadian Federation of Students, really speaks to me. It aims to create awareness about date rape and consensual sex (heterosexual, that is, as sexual violence toward women by men is still skyrocketing). I love the way they have framed their campaign, by means of this poster especially. From my own experience, I have never felt I had the right to say no to sex, let alone the right even to my own body. The words "maybe", or "I'm not sure", or "can we wait?" were said out of fear of being rejected, disproved. Male approval and value was always a factor in my self-esteem, unfortunately. 

Don't you think something is wrong here? I've seen it elsewhere too, in popular culture, in the lives other girls and women I have known. Our society and culture has constructed sex as men's, as for men. Even in legal issues--women are STILL in some way blamed for sexual assault and rape (the way they were dressed provoked men, they didn't fight back). NO, no, NO. This just goes to show that women are considered responsible for men's poor (among other things) behavior and sexual desire in still very much patriarchal society. It is also reveals the extent to which Victorian ideas about women still exist. So, let's get something straight: men are responsible for their behavior and sexual desire, and women have the right to their bodies and their desires for sex--men DO NOT.

xo Caroline

* I should note that I know not all men are like this, or, are able to unlearn these kinds of ideas/narratives. I have met some absolutely amazing men... Jimmy among them.